Last night I was around at friends of my flatmate’s place (who I could possibly claim as my own friends now). Talia and I were going to go see indiepop's premier husband and wife duo Mates Of State (sorry Kanda). General Friday night conversation was being made when the topic turned to someone they referred to as "Manchedder". This sparked a story in me from my youth, which, as I have already related it to people I barely know, I don't see why I shouldn't go one step further and post it on the internet.
Up until I was about 16 (or possibly even 17) I had no idea what circumcision was. I had been circumcised at birth, but was completely unaware that this wasn't the natural state of the penis. One day at school I overheard a conversation between two boys about their "dick cheese". Apparently, urine would get caught in something called a "foreskin", dry up and form "dick cheese". Being rather repulsed, but also immensely fascinated I went to the school library to investigate what a foreskin was. Luckily for me in the explanation circumcision was mentioned, so I looked up that as well. Rather than be astonished that I had been mutilated* at birth, my first reaction to this newly obtained information was one of relief that I would never have to experience the repulsive phenomenon of "dick cheese".
Although the story wasn't received as the charming and witty anecdote that I thought it would, it didn't result in my immediate expulsion from the house and the friendship circle.
*For the record I actually don't consider it to be mutilation and am extremely pro (male) circumcision
Mates Of State played in Melbourne a few days before I left. However, due to me having to solve the slight problem of a stolen passport, I was unable to attend. So I was quite pleased when I saw that the band would be playing in Montreal. I was also quite pleased that it was going to cost me a third of what it would have in Melbourne.
With an enjoyable support set from The Starlight Mints, and Mates of State drawing heavily from their latest album, Bring It Back (one of my favourites of the year so far), it was turning into one indietastic evening! However, there is always a spoiler and it came in the form of an oblivious moron whose aggressive movements (we won't call it dancing) and beer-spilling antics I found highly inappropriate. It always amazes me when such buffoons are attending the same show that I am. Firstly, there should be a screening process and anyone who even looks remotely like they could be a Limp Bizkit fan should not be allowed to enter the venue, but also, what possible interest could such a unfortunate human being have with a cute indiepop band? The icing was when he lent over to his pony-tailed friend (who looked like Michael Bolton with down syndrome) standing next to him and yelled, "Man, she's got a great body", about Mates Of State’s Kori Gardner.
The absurd presence of this Neanderthal was highlighted by the most adorably cute indie girl dancing to our right, the kind of girl whom I'm perpetually day-dreaming about. She was the type of person you'd expect to see at a Mates Of State show. The contrast between the two couldn’t have been starker. I don’t mean to come across in any way elitist, it’s just that I spend so long working on my illusions of certain bands’ fanbases, I find it hard to come to terms with that imagery being challenged.
After the show we went and got bagels and Talia told me about the conflict between those who prefer St-Viateur Bagels and those who prefer Fairmount Bagels (two bagel shops on the same street). Apparently it says a lot about what type of person you are by which bagels you prefer. We went to St-Viateur. I bought three bagels and ate them on the walk home.
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